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OxiClean Product Review–Should a Man Really Be Doing Laundry?

by Troy Pattee

Should a man really be doing laundry?
Formerly solid-white karate pants

I’m writing this in lower case because I don’t want my wife to hear. This post is about laundry, and the last thing I want her to learn is that I not only washed some clothes, but even tried an advanced stain removal technique. That’s a slippery slope, my friend. And one I’ve always tried to avoid.

A few weeks ago I agreed to try out and then write a review on OxiClean stain remover. Around this same time we enrolled one of our sons in his first karate class. Can you see where this is going? That’s right, white karate pants. Who comes up with these things?

Despite regular and clear instructions to take off the white karate pants the moment he arrived home, he somehow managed to forget. By dinner time the damage was done. As frustrated as I was however, I found it hard to get too mad at a kid who had grass stains on his pants. That’s just part of being a boy. Plus it would give me a chance to try out the OxiClean.

So I got out the pants, put them on the floor, and snapped some pictures. Then I followed the OxiClean instructions precisely (often the hardest part for a man, but I prevailed). Perhaps it was the scent of clothes being cleaned or maybe it was just time for my afternoon nap, but somehow my mind wandered to all of the laundry detergent commercials I had seen as a child. Tag lines like “Calgon, take me away” and “ancient Chinese secret” tormented me as I struggled to suppress my natural male instinct to avoid laundry at any cost.

Moments later I was startled awake. I was on the couch, and a loud buzzer was blaring in the background. I must have drifted off. Upon investigation I found the noise was coming from the clothes dryer. To my surprise (and great relief) the laundry was finished. Somehow it had even made it into the dryer.

Like a young boy on Christmas morning I pulled open the door and thrust my arms into the machine. I could feel a shirt, then maybe a towel, and then…HOLY DANCING HYENAS! The clothes were scorching hot. I was fairly sure my eyebrows were singed, and knew without a doubt that my arms had suffered third-degree burns.

Okay, I exaggerate. But they were surprisingly hot.

In the end I was happy to see that the karate pants had returned to their original color. The OxiClean had worked its wonders. Now I would just need to hide the evidence.

OxiClean Versatile Stain Remover

• Chlorine free

• Color safe

• Concentrated formula

Designed for maximum strength stain removal, in your laundry and around your home.

I wrote this review while participating in a blog tour by Dad Central Consulting on behalf of OxiClean and received OxiClean items to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for taking the time to participate.”

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5 responses to “OxiClean Product Review–Should a Man Really Be Doing Laundry?”

  1. Carrie with Children says:
    October 2, 2011 at 9:37 pm

    Holy dancing hyenas is officially my new favorite phrase. Great review – so proud of you for doing laundry…. can you teach my husband?!

  2. Stefanie says:
    October 4, 2011 at 9:27 pm

    Hilarious! We are big fans of OxiClean in our house. That crap works!

  3. Becky says:
    October 26, 2011 at 11:15 pm

    Troy you are hilarious! But I already knew that. I didn’t know you had a blog – awesome!

  4. Seemore Balls says:
    December 31, 2011 at 6:57 pm

    I’m very disappointed in the new spokesman for Oxiclean. He does not have nearly as much energy as Billy Maze. I would appreciate, along with many other Americans if the new spokesman took up snorting cocaine. He would then have much more energy and we would probably even pay an extra 5 cents for the product. Thank you and please consider my wants.

  5. Cari McBride says:
    March 8, 2012 at 9:50 am

    You had me at “I’m writing this in lower case because I don’t want my wife to hear.” Hahaha Troy you are so funny. Great post. I would send this to Jonah as a hint but I would never let him get near the laundry, OxiClean or no OxiClean!!!

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